I’m not sure of the origin of this piece, but I was going though some old emails that I had saved and this was there. Upon reading it again, I looked back of some of the mistakes that I’ve made thoughout the course of various relationships. I’m sure that there is something there that we all can relate to. So I figured that I’d share it is a thought for the day.
How to Ruin A Perfectly Good Relationship
1. Control everything and everyone
2. Never take the blame yourself; instead, make your partner wrong
3. Make it a habit to spend more money than you have
4. Win every fight, even the ones you couldn’t care less about
5. Keep score
6. Use threat often
7. Find your partner’s weak spot and use it against him/her.
8. When your partner tries to please you, find fault with their efforts
9. Hold fast to the belief: “If you loved me you would know what I want”
10. Demand your partner remain faithful but refuse to meet his or her sexual needs
11. Use silence as a weapon
12. Pretend that you don’t hear
13. When your partner tries to apologize, bring up more complaints
14. Refuse to give information
15. When you realize you haven’t given your partner some important info, insist that you did
16. Claim to be the only one interested in the relationship
17. Never ask for help
18. Confide only in friends
19. Take it personally when your partner wants time alone
20. Discount your partner’s physical complaints
21. Give advice where it isn’t welcome
22. Never pick up after yourself
23. Refuse to seek help for your depression
24. Refuse to talk
25. Focus on changing your partner
26. Focus all your needs on sex
27. Take all problems as further proof that the relationship will not work
28. Put your friends before your partner
29. Keep romantic gestures to a minimum
30. Focus on your partner’s faults and deny your own
31. Let days go by without a kind word or loving gesture
32. Practice verbal abuse
33. Do not listen to your partner’s ideas or suggestions
34. Ask your partner to share feelings and when s/he does, EXPLODE
35. Start conversations when your partner is busy, or better yet, exhausted
36. Let disagreements fester
37. Say what you think your partner wants to hear, then do as you please
3. Make it a habit to spend more money than you have
Good point and it’s not just an issue exclusive to a person single.
5. Keep score
The eye for an eye mentality never works when in a relationship
7. Find your partner’s weak spot and use it against him/her.
Will immediately shut the door of open and honest communication.
10. Demand your partner remain faithful but refuse to meet his or her sexual needs
Enough said
25. Focus on changing your partner
Preach!!!
31. Let days go by without a kind word or loving gesture
So simple, yet commonly forgotten.
37. Say what you think your partner wants to hear, then do as you please
The absolute truth!
This is a powerful list- in that its true. These things are so detrimental to relationships, and unfortunately, I’ve been guilty of some of them.
The one that rings a bell the most with me is this:
11. Use silence as a weapon
This is a definitely a weapon with devastating consequences after its used.
Thanks so much for posting this!
Peace.
~UB
I will bookmark this and come back to it when I am in a relationship?
It should be titled….WAYS TO LOSE A GOOD WOMAN…..naw just joking LOL……that can be applied to both. GOod list. But what happens if you don’t do any of these and your s/o still leaves?
@ woman on the move – I see you took note of some that might’ve touched a few nerves
@ urban butterfly – yeah, the silent thing is really a relationship killer in itself
@ Organized Noise – aiiight… do that
@ NegroPino – if the s/o still leaves then I suppose the relationship just wasn’t that significant and things weren’t meant to be
This was right on time!
I need to look at myself, and will pass it on to my S/O too.
Thanks Greg!
This was well put together and much so needed…some of these things are so simple yet we often forget about them or just ignore the fact that we do these things ourselves…in order for something to really work, we MUST first look at ourselves and do something about our OWN issues and faults…and STOP blaiming other folks…
GREAT post G!
Thanks for the birthday wishes. I had a blast and fortunately lived to tell. (silly snicker). This is a great piece for BOTH men and women. I’m not a male basher, I only bash the ones necessary. Women (in my opinion) tend to be their own worst enemies in relationships and those this points to, need to take note. And for the men, yeah, you need to read up too. For myself, remain single so I don’t have to worry about the majority of this.
I certainly was guily of the silent treatment-
I realize silence is never the answer. Basically it just shuts down all commmunication.